In the psalms, last Tuesday morning, came the verse:

 But all the wicked shall perish

and all the enemies of the Lord.

They are like the beauty of the meadows,

They shall vanish, they shall vanish like smoke.

(Psalm 36, Grail Translation)

Dark Rider

These words put me in mind of various films, of a certain genre, I have seen, one of which was ‘Lord of the Rings’. In this ‘epic’, there were nine evil men – in league with those trying to destroy the ‘Hobbits’ – who had the ‘Ring’ with them. The ‘Nine’ rode fast and furiously on black horses, wearing black hoods that hid their faces. In one scene, the hoods opened up and their faces did not exist. Instead there was just ‘nothing’.  In the end, these ghastly evil presences simply disintegrated; much the same sort of thing happens in many horror movies. The ‘evil monster’, when challenged, will disappear – or disintegrate – in a puff of smoke. 

Many people, especially the very young, are frightened of the dark, of nothingness, of loneliness and of evil. I think that these fears have their roots, largely, in the awareness we have of our ‘impotence’ in the face of forces we do not understand, in our ‘inability’, often, to change things and to bring about their metamorphosis to things as we would like them – into things we are comfortable with; involved in these feelings, certainly, are those senses we can all experience, of being worthless, powerless – when faced with the unknown. Against all this, I am driven to reflect on the Divine Majesty of God, and that one day each of us, having ‘vanished, vanished like smoke, will find ourselves in His presence. There before God, He will not want us to be just an ‘empty shell’ – a ‘pale shadow’ of our real selves; He wishes us to have that ‘fullness of life’, that ‘magnificence of spirit’, for did not Jesus witness that: "I have come that they may have life, life to the full". Now, you may ask: "Is this a paradox with no solution?" I don’t think so, and in this regard, events, experience and help from important Christian teachings, can throw much light on the matter. 

This last week has been one of those times that have affected me deeply – no doubt because of the experiences it brought – and these have led to a certain chain of thought. A few days ago, I was privileged to be with a friend of mine, Malcolm, when he was dying, and although I had not been involved in the hard work – staying up all night with him – as he approached this serious moment of his life, it happened that this was the way ‘providence’ arranged things. (We Catholics pray the Hail Mary throughout our lives, asking Our Lady’s help: "…. pray for us sinners now, and at the hour of our death" – and often, I would wager, not fully realising the absolute importance of these two moments of our lives – especially the latter.  Whoever composed this prayer was a genius, someone, I suspect, very much filled with the Holy Spirit.)  But, to continue, with me were two other mutual friends, so I was not alone with Malcolm, as he departed this life.  

When one’s friend, just before he dies, opens his eyes and looks at those who are with him, there is a very real and moving finality about this; there is also another look, so it sometimes seems, at someone else behind – or beyond – those in immediate focus, then, gradually, his breathing stops, and one is there in that dramatic silence, an awesome moment as the life of a friend comes to an irrevocable end; this, to be sure, is something that, certainly, sends out its mark to those close by, and to those observers it can seem as if there is a departure into nothingness – into a complete and void emptiness – into a hole that is left behind. 

However, when you know a great deal about the loving goodness of your friend, and the efforts he has made to live as good a life as he could, within his own limitations and personality, you realise that the words Jesus spoke, in the Gospel, just before he died, ring very true for such a loved one: 

"After Jesus had spoken these words, he looked up to heaven and said, ‘Father the hour has come; glorify your Son so that the Son may glorify you, since you have given him authority over all people, to give eternal life to all whom you have given him. And this is eternal life, that they may know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom you have sent. I glorified you on earth by finishing the work you gave me to do." John 17; 1-4 

Malcolm had finished the work given him by his Creator. This was to remain faithful to God, right to the very end, and on his journey of life, to have done all he could to follow the path God had marked out for him. I found myself, in his last moments of life, simply saying: "Thank You" to him, just for being himself. Looking back over our friendship, it wasn’t so much because of his abilities as a ‘wit’, as an interesting companion, as a loyal supporter of so many, but just his ‘being’ that had now ‘gone’. There is now a ‘hole’ in my life – and in the life of his friends – a ‘hole’ that he once filled. I look around and at a picture of my own ‘blood’ brother, Tim – brother and life-long friend – that reminds me so much of Malcolm, and have the same feeling – an emptiness in me, a ‘hole’ that is left because he is no longer here. 

However, in both these bereavements, I do not feel ‘lost’: rather there is a knowledge that the relationship remains, constant, unbending, unbroken, and I can continue to talk with them, in my mind and heart, in a way that is meaningful. It is not a complete ‘emptiness’, of ‘nothingness’, but somehow a ‘full’ emptiness that is taken up by the power and the presence of LOVE; LOVE that reflects their way of being, LOVE that reflects their way of loving, because the beauty I see in them is the development, in them, of gifts that were not theirs, but reflections in them of God’s LOVE. 

It is not easy, to put into explanatory words, the ‘realities’ I know to be true. Before sharing these with you, I must tell you that Malcolm, a Probation Officer working in Prisons, was also dedicated to God, and had decided to forgo the vocation of marriage – just like priests, monks and nuns. Two ‘illustrations’ will help to throw light on the matter. Both come from ‘holy’ women, the first of whom is Mother Teresa of Calcutta, who writes about ordained priests, but her statement applies to all who, out of love for God, and accepting his gift, live a celibate life:

Mother Teresa of Calcutta

"Dear collaborators with Christ, you have said "Yes" to Jesus and He has taken you at your word. The Word of God became in Jesus "poverty". Your priestly celibacy is the terrible emptiness that you experience. God is not able to satisfy whatever is full. He can only fill what is empty…Today He wants to live his complete submission to the Father in you; agree with him and let Him do it. It does not matter what you experience, but what He does in you……You and me should do everything to let Him live in us and through us, in this world. Be very close to Our Lady, because she, before she became full of grace, full of Jesus, had to enter this darkness. "How will that be possible?" she asked. Yet in the moment she spoke her "Yes", she felt the need to hurry away to take Jesus to John and his family." 

For me, it is through the loving acceptance of God, in the emptiness of my being, that I can find the way to let Him fill my life – and this in collaboration with others – who wish to do the same. He will then help me to take himself – who is LOVE – to others with whom I come in contact.  

The second lady is a parishioner, called Nora, who is very ill with cancer. She is, also, almost totally blind, bed-ridden, grieving the death of her husband only four and a half months ago, and yet she remains serene, and sure of God’s immense goodness and love for her. I found myself saying, in a short note, a ‘Thank You’ to her, also, for her response to God’s gift, knowing and saying – as  she continually does – how good God is; I told her that she reminded me of a soul with Our Lady living within her.  

To offer a little further explanation, the ‘emptiness’ that is filled by God’s presence is a beautiful ‘emptiness’, quite different from the ‘ugly emptiness’ of those who live  estranged from God. Everything will appear to disappear into ‘nothingness’ when we pass from this world to the next, as Malcolm did before my eyes. But, for the ‘just’ it will not be like the emptiness of the wicked who shall ‘vanish like smoke’. This ‘emptiness’ for the ‘just’ is a void that will be filled with the goodness of God – a fullness of God that is built on our own ‘YES’ to Him every day, and built on the nothingness of our human nature, filled with the power and wisdom and love of God. 

Malcolm Pyman (Died 30 August 2010) May he Rest in Peace

One final word about my friend, Malcolm; in the last days of his life, a friend asked him for a word of encouragement for all, and he simply said: "Keep moving onward". Malcolm, I think, is saying this in his picture.

During the last week, I met a lady who told me she had learned 45 different psalms, by heart. Her statement struck a chord with me, because I once learnt, by heart, Chapter 17 of John’s gospel. This, to me, was a really worthwhile exercise because, at times, walking along, alone and with time to myself, in thought – and whatever else – I used to repeat the chapter to myself, and the words were capable of assuming meanings, and facets of meanings, I never suspected they had.  I believe it will be the same for this good lady, and her psalms. In the psalms, there is much that touches a personal chord, especially for someone trying to live as a faithful follower of the Lord; He is the inspirer of the psalms; they are God’s prayers to himself for they were used by Jesus; moreover, they remain to be used by us who are still here on earth.

However, I could not leave things just like that.  The lady and her psalms had given me a ‘kick-start’ to then look again at John, Chapter 17, using a different translation – different from the one I had used before – and this gave a new slant on the meaning of the text:

"I am asking on their behalf; I am not asking on behalf of the world, but on behalf of those you gave me, because they are yours".

Jesus seems to distinguish the world of God and the world in which we all live. On reflection, this is not so surprising, when we remember Jesus and his temptation by the devil … … 

‘Then Satan .. … in an instant showed him all the kingdoms of the world…’ and said to Jesus: "To you I will give their glory and all this authority; for it has been given over to me, and I give it to anyone I please" (Luke 4: 5-6).

In these quotations, we have two worlds, described by Jesus – this sense of a world that belongs to God, and all those that God has given to Jesus – and that other world that does not belong to God.

Abbot Cuthbert Madden of Ampleforth, August 2010

In the context of our monastic life and our August Chapter, it is good to think about the ideal that we are called to – that ideal which leads to a life in God, and not of the world. I remember, many years ago, talking to the father of monastic contemporary of mine, who came to visit and stay with us when we made our final profession, as monks. He then marvelled at the ‘beauty’ of our way of life, and said to me: "You are all like brothers, supporting, helping and loving each other as in a family".

Two Contented Older Monks

Our Monks at Work and in Relaxation

Benedictine Monks are called to follow God in the pattern laid down by St. Benedict. The life consists of brothers, or sisters, (as the case may be), living as a family, under an Abbot or Abbess – a life that entails giving up one’s own possessions, one’s own will, and living a celibate life, in community.  We do not take vows of poverty, chastity and obedience – although my novice master used to say that our vows amounted to the same thing. Our vows are actually named ‘Conversion of Life’, ‘Stability’ and ‘Obedience’.  And, as one would expect, the context of life, for a monk, is much focussed. We pray together the monastic office, and spend a ‘longish’ time, each day, in this prayer, or in praise to God. St. Benedict called this ‘The work of God’ or, in Latin, ‘Opus Dei’.  Nothing is more important for St. Benedict than this work of prayer.  However, this primary is complemented by private prayer, ‘Lectio Divina’ (prayerful reading) – studying and reading.

Quite apart from this life of prayer, the monks work to earn the money needed to live and survive, and so there is work to be done of the most varied kinds, according to each monastery. Our monastery has a wide range of working patterns – a range which includes teaching in the monastic school, Ampleforth College, the work of chaplains in the school, hospitality work with guests – including retreats, talks and conferences – then there is life, and work, on the parishes. Lastly, but by no means least, there is the manual work that needs to be done – work in the orchard, in the gardens and in the woods, belonging to the monastery.

I believe it to be an interesting fact, that the monastic life, whilst ‘not according to the norms of most peoples’ lives’, manifests, at the same time, a life of great contentment and joy – at its best. It is quite hard – difficult in words – to ‘pin down’ the ‘charism’ of monastic life; some refer to it as ‘Prayer and Work’, (in Latin, Ora et Labora), or ‘Peace among Thorns’, (in Latin, Pax inter Spinas).  What is certain, however, is that all of us within our monastery, know monks who have lived the Ampleforth monastic way of life for 60 years, and more – and are still full of love and joy – what a wonderful gift from God!  But, monastic life also points the way to something ‘special’ for all people. Those of us who are not called to be monks, nevertheless, are called, in our own way, ‘to be in the world’ – but not ‘of the world’, where we can, with God’s help, integrate ‘Prayer and Work’ into our lives, so that our lives also become ‘unified’. This is a Christian ‘calling’, common to all of us, and so each one of us needs to learn how to aspire to that calling, each in our own individual way. Certainly, we all need to find a place for prayer, and for work, these two important aspects of our lives in harmony with each other.

I look at the world in which we live, at life today in contemporary Britain, and at recent events from which one cannot escape, and all this makes me stop and think about the power of the world – that other world – the one that does not belong to God.  Many of the values that constantly bombard people – values inculcated – ingrained almost – within our culture, are, to put it mildly, rather godless. Recently, the extent of growth in addictions, for example, those to do with ‘sex, drugs, drink, alcohol and greed for more – money and possessions’ – has ‘homed in’ on me.   In this kind of world, everyone can recognise a Christian, because they live in a different way, a way that is free from any slavery to addiction, and, on an even more positive footing, putting God first, putting Sunday worship before other things, putting oneself out to worship God each week.  Take Sunday, and any town in England, including Leyland. You will see many cars at the shopping centres, outside the swimming pools, and loads of young people playing sport. Now, all these things are good, in themselves; people do need to shop, it is good to relax, it is good to support the young in sport.   But, where is God in all this?  Yes, of course, there are those who come to church to worship God, as well, people who are prepared to give that time to God rather than to the other ‘necessities’ or ‘luxuries’ of life, but these are only a very small minority.  It comes down to a matter of priority.  Unfortunately, for many in Britain, the priority is not worshipping God, together in the faith community, but in taking themselves off to that ‘other’ world.

Thank God, God’s world still exists and it is heartening to know that much praying goes on, each day, in peoples’ lives, within our Parish. A few have the time and energy to join us, here in the Parish Community, for the daily round of ‘Morning Prayer’ that usually begins 45 minutes before the morning Mass. In our Priory Community, we have Midday Prayer, each day, and, of course, Evening Prayer, as we monks wish, very much, to do our best to keep community prayer alive, each day.

Prayer can take many forms and family prayer together is a very good way to introduce, and maintain, a rhythm of prayer. Thus, some pray together at each meal, and others have family morning prayers at breakfast, to thank and praise God for the new day, and to ask God’s blessing on each day’s activities. Prayers, and the things of God, are so inter-linked. Preparing our children for first Holy Communion is another aspect of Christian Life and prayer, as it leads to our involvement in the most important prayer of all, the Mass. In this regard, Chandon Oakley recently made her preparations in Australia, and then came back to her Grand-parents’ Parish, here in Leyland, for her first Holy Communion, on the 15th August, this year.

(1)  Praying the Morning Office at Leyland (2) Chandon Oakley’s 1st Holy Communion, The Assumption, 2010

"I am asking on their behalf; I am not asking on behalf of the world, but on behalf of those you gave me, because they are yours".

When Jesus asks God for something, it is Jesus who is praying.  He prays for us, continually, in heaven, and this, too, can give us another understanding of God’s immense love for us, and could lead to a desire, on our part, to respond to Him.  In this way, we can be sure we are among those that God has ‘given to Jesus’; in fact, all people are candidates for this great privilege – the privilege of belonging to Jesus. On this point, it is enough for us just to want to be with God, to decide to believe in Him, and act on our belief; if we do this, in all sincerity, God will help us to be united with Him, and to live his will throughout the circumstances of our lives. Then, in this confusing world of ours, things will acquire new meaning and new purpose; then, we will become people of peace and harmony, in ‘Prayer and in Work’.

Ampleforth Abbey Church

During this last week, we have had our Summer (August) Chapter meeting for all the monks of Ampleforth Abbey. Chapter is a time when the brethren come together to discuss important business considerations of the monastery and in St. Benedict’s Holy Rule there is provision for such meetings. Bear in mind, St. Benedict lived from about 480AD to 547AD, so the Rule of St. Benedict is very ancient. It is still read every day in monastic houses – we read it each day, here in Leyland – and, with the help of the Holy Spirit in all Religious Life, including Benedictine monasteries like Ampleforth, we are formed into a family of God where we pray, and where we hope, God is always present.

Of calling the Brethren to Council - Chapter 3 of the Rule of St. Benedict.

As often as any important business has to be done in the monastery, let the abbot call together the whole community and himself set forth the matter. And, having heard the advice of the brethren, let him take counsel with himself and then do what he shall judge to be most expedient. Now the reason we have said that all should be called to council, is that God often reveals what is better to the younger. Let the brethren give their advice with all deference and humility, nor venture to defend their opinions obstinately; but let the decision depend rather on the abbot’s judgement, so that when he has decided what is the better course, all may obey. However, just as it is proper for disciples to obey their master, so it is becoming that he on his part should dispose all things with prudence and justice.

In all things, therefore, let all follow the Rule as master, nor let anyone rashly depart from it.

Monks in Choir praying

What this says is that everyone is ‘under’ the Rule, and we should realise that, for St. Benedict (as for all founders of Religious Life, in any form), the Gospel is what they must follow. In the prologue of the Rule of St. Benedict it is stated: "Let us, therefore, gird our loins with faith and the performance of good works, and following the guidance of the Gospel walk in his paths."  Essentially, this precept means that everyone should live and work according to the Word of God  - and here the word ‘everyone’ includes the Abbot and all the monks, and all the important and less important people in the monastery. This guiding principle is the same for any Christian association, such as a school. Not only are the students under the Word of God, but so is the head-teacher, staff and everyone. It is the same with a parish: the Priests, (the monks in our case), are as much under the Word of God as the parishioners.

This is the context for our Chapter meetings which, of course, are now arranged according to our present-day culture, some fifteen hundred years after St. Benedict was alive. Invariably, it is a time when many people have many things to say; the Abbot will also put forward his views, and all try to listen to each other. Nowadays, we often break up into smaller groups, so that each person will really have the chance to say what he wants to say, in an ‘easy’ and ‘comfortable’ atmosphere; ultimately, all the group discussions – the differing points and opinions – are reported back to the whole community.

For us monks, one of the highlights of the Chapter is the celebration, each year, of jubilees. Readers of this blog might like to know that, in fact, monks are very restrained when it comes to the celebration of jubilees – at least in our Abbey. All that happens is the enjoyment of a glass of wine for the monks and  an introduction by the Abbot, followed by a short speech by the jubilarian, and a formal – though poignant – song in Latin, "Ad moltos annos vivat, plurimosque annos vivat", (May he live for many years and many more years). This year, for the first time, all was combined with a good meal, during which we had our celebratory glass of wine, and between courses, the speeches were made. It was organised in this way to save time, largely because, this year, there was a ‘bumper crop’ of ten jubilarians.

(In passing, we had the privilege of two Tanzanian monks staying with us in Ampleforth, this year, and I asked one of them, Brother Alphonse – who will be in Leyland for three weeks, in September – what they did in their big monastery for jubilees? He described how they have a big feast, speeches are made and then the younger monks would sing joyful African songs for the older ones.  Exuberant Africans do things in a different way! It is also usual in England for diocesan priests to have ‘big’ celebrations for their silver, ruby and golden jubilees of priesthood.)

In our monastery, this is not our tradition and I wonder if this is because of our ‘English culture’, as our monastery is very ‘English’ in its ‘tone’. I remember my novice master, an Irishman, Fr. Bruno Donovan from Galway, speaking to us on this very point. He actually made a huge contribution to the spiritual welfare of many monks in our abbey, and was much loved. Rather surprisingly, he also shared with us novices, something of his sufferings, brought about by living as an Irishman in an English culture.  You may wonder, but it took him a long time to come to terms with his ‘lot’. Perhaps it was this sense of an Irishman, lost in a sea of the English, in part, that made him such an empathetic person, and such a good friend to so many people! True empathy can be an especially wonderful gift and he certainly had it in abundance. On this particular ‘Irish Question’, I remember that it was only when I came to work on the parishes that I heard, for the first time, the hymn ‘Hail Glorious St. Patrick’.  This occurred at Warrington, St. Mary’s Parish and the very ‘English’ Parish Priest there was Fr. Gabriel Gilbey. Fr. Gabriel always flew the flag of St. George on the flag-pole, 23rd April – his Feast Day – but would not fly the Irish ‘Tricolour’ on St. Patrick ’s Day, much to the annoyance of many Irish parishioners. Parishioners tend to be far less restrained than the monks, within the monastery, when it comes to celebrating jubilees or birthdays – very much a tradition in our Benedictine parishes, and to prove the point, witness Bishop Ambrose’s 80th birthday, my 50th birthday and Fr. Martin’s Golden jubilee of priesthood, here in Leyland, among others I could mention.

Abbot Patrick Barry our oldest Jubilarian

As I noted a little earlier, this year there were ten such jubilarians to celebrate – quite a number! The names included several monks that people from our Parish, would know as old friends. Abbot Patrick Barry celebrated 75 years of his clothing as a monk, (1935), and 65 years of priesthood, (1945) – almost two life-times of service; he quite often visited Leyland as our Abbot. Fr. Martin Haigh and Fr. Theodore Young celebrated 70 years of clothing (1940).  Our ‘slightly more youthful’ Bishop Ambrose, Fr. David O’Brien (now at Bamber Bridge – but often supplying for us at week-day Mass) and Fr. Rupert Everest, all celebrated 60 years of clothing as monks (1950), and Fr. Alberic Stacpoole, (who, some years ago, spent a year in Leyland), celebrated 50 years of clothing (1960). It is very encouraging, enlightening and also moving for a ‘slip-of-a-lad’ (like myself), to see the continuing enthusiasm, joy and sense of humour in these wonderful men, as they each shared, briefly, something of their experiences of monastic life – experiences, it must be said, of God working in their lives. They are like our "Granddads", and just as often in families, we venerate and love our grandparents, so it is the same in monastic life.

Psalm 93 talks about the youthfulness of those who love God – a quality borne out by these jubilarians – and something very much attested to by our celebrations:

"The just will flourish like a palm-tree

That grows like a Lebanon cedar;

Planted in the house of the Lord

They will flourish in the courts of our God,

Still bearing fruit when they are old,

Still full of sap still green,

To proclaim that the Lord is just,

In him, my rock, there is no wrong."

(Psalm 91: 13-16)

At this Chapter we also renew our vows – vows that we have taken for life – at the Mass on the last day. This took place on Wednesday 18 August and, collectively and for each individual, it was very much a joyful act of Faith, as who knows what each New Year will bring? Again, everyone, including the Abbot renews their vows, even though most of us have, of course, made our monastic vows a life-long commitment.

To conclude, and to underline all that has gone before, Chapter is always a moment to stand before God, and to face him – taking in all the challenge and loneliness that can entail – but then, the reward, potentially, is something wonderful to behold. St Benedict in his rule put it like this:

"As we progress in our monastic life and in faith, our hearts shall be enlarged, and we shall run with unspeakable sweetness of live in the way of God’s commandments". (Prologue to the Rule)